The Question I Hate Getting Asked

Winter break is treating me well. There is nothing better than sleeping in (that’s til about 7:30am for me), reading in bed, and hanging out with family and friends. However, whenever I see people that I haven’t talked to in awhile, I always get asked, “What are your plans for the future?” or some other version of that same question. It drives me nuts because I have to come up with a concise answer when in actuality I should really say, “I have no clue what I am doing with my life. I’m considering about 10 career options at the moment.”

I hate being in this period of the unknown. For me, I always find comfort in having a plan (as well as back up plans). As far as the future goes, I just never feel certain on anything. For a year now, I have been pretty set on going to medical school, which seems like a great option for me. I love school, I am dedicated, and I genuinely want to help people. How can I be certain, though, that becoming a doctor will bring me the most fulfillment and joy? Medical school requires a lot of sacrifice and work, and if I decide to go that route, I want to be certain that it is the best option for me. I have also considered other health careers, such as becoming a PA, a nutritionist, or a physical therapist. If the medical field is not the right place for me, I have considered a career in public health or in food science because they both deal with health and nutrition in settings outside of a hospital.

All in all, I’m straight up confused. I think it bothers me so much because at the end of the day, I want to follow God’s plan for me. I want to seek the vocation that he calls be to pursue, but I so often try to control my future. I’m in a constant internal battle between trying to surrender to God and trying to take matters into my own hands. I honestly pray that I can be free of the anxiety that comes with the unknown future. I wish I could be better at living each day as its own, rather than planning for the years to come. Hopefully, I can learn to trust  that God will show me what I am passionate about through my interactions with others in my daily life. Right now I know that I am passionate about serving foster children and caring for those who are vulnerable in society. I am interested in traveling, health, all things science (NOT PHYSICS), and social justice issues regarding malnourishment in the world and environmental problems. All I can do right now is have faith that God will show me the path that I am supposed to take based on the opportunities that he either gives me or closes off from me.

Rather than tensing up when asked the dreaded career question, my goal is to work on making peace with the fact that I do not know. Instead it is a great opportunity to let God be God and to allow him to really work through me. If you have any encouraging words or advice that helped you decide on your career path, feel free to share them with me!

Lots of love,


From Observing Patients to Feeling Like a Patient


For a long time, I have been trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. I have almost always been drawn to a career in the medical field– as a doctor, PA, or something else entirely. Being the determined individual that I am, I’m currently leaning towards a career as a doctor. I don’t know what type of specialty I want to pursue, but being an OBGYN sounds interesting for various reasons. One, OBGYNs get to deliver babies. How cool would it be to bring life into the world?!?! Also, women’s health is really interesting to me. Most people squirm in disgust with anything related to women’s health issues, but I think every women deserves to be educated about their health. Yesterday, I got the opportunity to shadow an amazing OBGYN near me, and through this experience, I was able to see what a day in the life of a doctor is like.

Yesterday, the doctor that I shadowed only had office appointments– no babies were born sadly. However, I did get to see pap smears, pelvic exams, pregnancy check ups, and more. I even got to use the doppler monitor to hear babies’ heartbeats. That was by far my favorite part of the day. It makes me so happy knowing that these babies are growing and developing healthily inside of their mothers. I wish I could have seen a baby being born, but hearing them in the womb was pretty great!

My OBGYN is also such a sweet person. I got to hear her medical journey– her stories of med school, residency, etc. She also gave me insight as to what it is like to be a women in medicine. She is such a role model because not only is she a successful doctor, but she is also a wife and mother of three children. I admire the way she puts family first in her life. If I decide to become a doctor, I hope that I can embody her attitude and values.

However, one event in particular made this day quite unique. I was in a room meeting a patient, and out of the blue I started feeling woozy. I immediately tried to leave the room, but the next thing I knew, I was on the ground in the hallway. Yup, I fainted. I have never fainted before, but I guess that if I’m going to faint somewhere, it might as well be in the doctor’s office. The nurses were so sweet. They got me ice packs and let me lie down on one of the patient tables. Even though, I came to observe patients, I practically became a patient myself. I quickly recovered, though. I think I just needed more food. The whole experience was hilarious looking back on it. This little setback didn’t stop me from having an amazing day observing a wonderful doctor. Here are main things that I learned today…

  1. Eat lots of food or else you might make a fool of yourself and end up on the floor in the doctor’s office.
  2. You can be a female doctor and still have a family. It takes a lot of work, but you can make it happen.
  3. I can really envision myself as a doctor. I like the challenge and dedication involved with the job. Plus, I don’t mind all the school– med school, I’m ready for you 😉

I’m so excited to see what the future holds for me. I’m so thankful for the unique opportunities that God has blessed me with. I can’t wait to see the plan that he has in store for me!


Lots of love,